Whoa Baby.

10 11 2008

For reals.  UncommonGoods.com is the best shopping site ever.  If you’ve gotten a gift from us over the past couple of years (when we’re not being pinko commies and doling out Kiva gift certificates) – especially a baby gift – it’s probably from there.  I mean where else can you get everything from a pack of peepee teepees to a onesie declaring your baby’s illiteracy?  If you have a baby girl, expect to receive a smartly wrapped bright blue box with a happy green ribbon – and, inside, a pink snapsuit that proclaims “No one puts baby in the corner.”  Perfect.


It’s nice to find a place where you can buy cool not-sugar-sweet clothes and toys and fun stuff.  Here’s just some of the baby stuff they have available.  But check out the other kids’ stuff – and definitely the regular people stuff, too.  Lots of great home decor, art, jewelry, and other treats.

Seriously – I’m turning you on to a gem of a site.  You can thank me later.


Honest to blog.

3 11 2008

I swear I’m going to update you on everything [and there’s a LOT of everything] going on in our lives.  Seems like when I work in an office, I fall off of the face of the earth.  Well, I plan to remedy that this week – both by blogging – and also by finishing my stint at 360jmg, the firm I’ve been working at this election cycle.

Here’s what I have to remember to cover in this massive posting I plan on writing this week:

  • Becky’s super-secret-surprise-birthday-halloween-costume-party extravaganza
  •  The election. I’ve almost purposely avoided blogging about politics this cycle. Most of you know what I think already – and everyone from outside of DC only seems to want to talk to me about it so I can tell them how smart they are and what a DC insider they sound like.  That said, I’m certainly happy that so many of my hitherto apathetic friends seem to get why I dragged Adam here and what I’ve been working for for the last 8 years.
  • Baby-ness.  We’re 5 weeks out and I’ve barely even mentioned him here.  I hear you saying to yourself, “Booo! Sandy sucks.”  Agreed.
  • TV – all of the new seasons have started and we need to talk about it – including the new Jeopardy theme music. Eww.
  • Pictures. I’ve got a TON of pics of everything from the Jimmy Buffett show to my giantness to Heidi and David’s wedding to our new front stoop and basement, to a baby shower – and even this weekend’s party. I’ll upload those bad boys soon.  Pretty hilarious.
  • Recent reading – and my book club.
  • My job.
  • A few more recipes that did not fail.
  • An update on Teddy and his bizarre health issues. (Don’t worry, nothing too bad!)
  • A request for stroller/baby stuff recommendations.  We have no clue what we need.  You baby mamas and baby daddies out there need to tell us what things you use that you can’t live without!

Ok – so that’s a lot to post about this week.  But I’ll try.

Is anybody even reading anymore, now that I’ve left you without any titillating info for months? If so, let me know I’m not just typing to the wall;)

Tourette’s for Preggers.

22 07 2008

So this morning I had what I would categorize as my first truly unreasonable emotional outburst – over a YouTube video aired on The Today Show – and then I got mad at Teddy for not understanding.  Yep.  I’ve lost my mind.

But, before you get all judgy, watch the video – with the volume up. The music makes it and you’ll think I’m a crazyhorse for losing it if you watch with your sound off.  I would like to point out, though, that the cheesy ending [“get back in touch with someone…”] was not on the original video I saw on the news and may have actually caused a spontaneous vomiting effect that would have counteracted all the crying.

I mean come on. If you didn’t tear up at that, you’re just the most heartless of the heartless.  Plus, did you happen to notice the striking resemblance that the lion bears to our Teddy?  Well, I see it – and this is where the story turns unreasonable.

So I’m crying – probably more than I ordinarily would.  But I don’t feel that unjustified because the news crew on The Today Show is also crying over the piece.  And then, I take a turn for the worse.  I make the connection between the lion and Ted – which leads me to notice that the lion jumps up and stands on his hind legs just like Teddy.  They move in a very similar way.

Then I realize that my Ted can’t really do that right now because his legs hurt him – which turns into – “He’s just a BABY!  What if he is unhappy for the rest of his life – or even dies, for that matter?!”  Which turns into an uncontrollable need to hug him and pet him.  So I get down in the floor to hug him, and he looks at me out of the corner of his eye like I’m a disgusting freak.  I extend my hand – and he LEANS AWAY FROM ME like I have the plague.  Are you kidding me?!  I feed him medicine out of my hand covered in peanut butter.  I pick up his poop and brush him and lay in his bed with him when he feels bad.  I sneak him treats.  I don’t kill him when I wake up in the morning to find he spent the night on the sofa – the evidence being a hairy spot of the sofa and a huge dark drool stain to match.  Just this morning I brushed him and scratched him and opened the door for him so he could lay down and still see outside.  And I can’t even get a little lovin’ when I’m visibly upset…over him?!

So here I am, sobbing, and now I think my dog has deliberately hurt my feelings.  Totally irrational.  And I know it’s totally irrational.  But that knowledge does nothing for me.  So I call Adam to tell him about it.  He is adorable and sweet and understanding, only mocking me for a second until he realizes I’m serious.  And then, hearing myself say these things aloud, I realize that I have absolutely become a cliche.  Ugh.

Updates Galore.

19 07 2008

Three updates in order of people’s likely interest:

1) Hint on the last post: one type of M&Ms has nuts; the other does not.

2) Teddy continues to struggle with his back legs, but he is going on steroids on Monday and the doctor is cautiously optimistic that he’ll turn things around in less than a week. He’ll have to stay on the steroids for a couple months, but there is guarded optimism. That being said, the diagnosis (which I can’t remember, but is basically early onset arthritis) is only the second time our doctor has ever actually seen it in a dog, so she isn’t even completely certain. It’s been an (expensive) ordeal, but we’ll keep our fingers crossed that he’ll be turning the corner. If this doesn’t work we have no idea where this will lead.

3) Last June I did a post about how DirecTV’s president actually replied to an email and they did something about our frustrations (DirecTV Cares About Their Customers.). One of the things they did last June was to waive our commitment fee (which is their euphemism for early termination penalty). We were so encouraged by that that three months later when the replacement receiver quit working we decided to stick with them. Problem is, DirecTV’s policy is that any time you get new equipment, you re-commit for two more years. So when I called today to cancel (because our nth replacement receiver also doesn’t work), I was met by a bunch of customer service reps and supervisors who refused to reply logic to the situation and simply repeated over and over that by replacing my receiver in September, I re-committed for 2 more years. The highlights of my calls:

a) being told by Rep 1 that only 2 weeks worth of customer history was available only to have Rep 2 spoke with be able to look at the account history from last year to confirm the commitment fee had been waived.

b) being disconnected by Rep 2 while I waited to speak to her supervisor.

c) being told by Rep 3 that the president of the company doesn’t actually read or respond to his own emails so of course I didn’t actually email with him.

d) being told by Rep 4 (a supervisor in the “retention department”) that she had too much work to do to let me explain everything to her and that the only way to resolve this was to again try to contact the president of the company. Rep 4 did not appreciate the following exchange:

me: what is your name and employee id#?

Rep 4: Jenny, ######

me: and what department are you a supervisor in?

Rep 4: Retention

me: that’s ironic

Rep 4 (angry): and why do you think that is ironic Mr. Zissman?

anyone have any experience with Dish Network? as soon as this is resolved, i think that is where we are headed.

[UPDATE: got a call from the “President’s Office” on a Sunday morning confirming that we won’t have any fees if wle e terminate. I guess there is a small office of competent people at DirecTV.]

Big News.

18 07 2008
(as opposed to the contents of the brown bag)

(as opposed to the contents of the brown bag)